Anyone who has read my lj knows that I am going through some stuff myself right now. Totally different from Kelly, because my diagnosis and treatment is straight forward, but still scary, and I have still had to spend a few nights in the hospital because of it. Part of me is relieved that I don't have to burden her with my problems. She had enough second hand encounters with cancer! But selfishly, I wish I had her to talk to. She could always make me laugh until I cried.
I wish I could have done more for her when she was alive - seen her more, talked to her on the phone more. You can't change the past, you can only learn from it.